UPDATE....did this train get derailed?
Here goes....the opening of the soulI have not lost any weight....I have not gained either...just stayed the same since January 23rd.
I am an emotional eater...I know there are 12 step programs for people like me. I have all the material to start a program if I could find others like me.
There is a lot of emotions I feel I have to work out....but....
I have learned:
I can choose how I feel. I can believe what I want to believe. Sometimes people hurt so much in their own lives, they want to drag everyone else down to their level. Sometimes others can not give us what we think we need. We have to fill our own holes in our heart. Most people do the best they can with what they have and will never realize that is enough. I can not change anyone but myself, and that is a chore. I can love people from afar. I LOVE MYSELF THE WAY I AM...and there is always ALWAYS room to improve. I am ok exactly where I am in my life....because I am right where GOD wants me to be!!!
I have not lost any weight...but I have continued training. I am training for a Triathlon in May. along with spit run's heart runs, and anything else I can get myself into before the BIG WALK in September. Yes I have eaten my way though MANY bags of chips, cookies and piles of chocolate. In my self destructive attempts to detail any success I might achieve. Because my heart was broken I went to my old habits and tried to eat enough to kill the pain. The pain is still here and I still feel sad.....even if I know in the deepest part of my soul...this is for the best....It still hurts....and that is OK...it is part of life!!! I will survive....I am strong!!!
